My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
