Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
