Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize
