Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
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