Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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