You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
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