I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I think I have vodka in my lungs
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
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