Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
