I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Randomize