You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize