Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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