TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
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