only if we run a train.
done.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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