a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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