I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs