She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
