I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I can't trust your balls anymore.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize