hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
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Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
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i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Randomize