I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Randomize
