Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
