I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I take back everything I said about communal showers
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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