at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Randomize
