I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
