so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
Randomize
