i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
