You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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