Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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