Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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