We're facebook friends in real life
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Drunk walkin through police station. America
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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