I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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