Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
