Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
