Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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