The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
