If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize