We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize