i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
