I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
Randomize
