I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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