once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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