The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
...so i touched it.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
It's never too late to be topless.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
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