is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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