Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
