Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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