Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
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