you guys were way drunker than both of me
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Crap I still need to get you a wedding gift. I'm just gonna give you a bag full of cash, lube, and condoms. And I'll use furry handcuffs instead of ribbon to tie the gift bag handles together.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
