love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
