You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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