just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
