So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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