I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
